To the tune of 'When Frederick Was A Little Lad' from The Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan
Filked by Sophie
I was trying to teach myself to multi-task (thank you Kelly!) by reading the
Episode I visual dictionary and listening to the Pirates of Penzance at the
same time. I came across this passage on p 60 about Sei Taria (The Asian
woman in the purple next to Valorum in the senate) which inspired this 'what
"Chancellor Valorum's administrative aide, Sei Taria assists him in
confirming the fine details of necessary procedural regulations. She has
learned much from Senator Palpatine."
As sung by Sei Taria:
When Darth Maul was a little lad he proved so brave and daring
His father thought he'd 'prentice him to some career uncaring.
I was, alas! his nursery maid and his father to me *im*plored
To take and bind the promising boy Apprentice at a *switch*board.
A life not bad for a hardy lad,
His working future assured,
Though I'm a maid, I'd be well paid
If I was working at a switchboard.
I was an honest nursery maid, no dealings in corruption,
But I did not catch the word a-right through a com-relay disruption.
Mistaking my instructions, which Were not easily *ig*nored,
I took and bound this promising boy Apprentice to a *Sith* Lord.
A sad mistake it was to make,
And doom him to this mentor,
I bound him to a Sith Lord - You!
Instead of at a switchboard.
I soon found out beyond all doubt the scope of this disaster.
(Already Sidious had instructed him to address him as 'My Master'.)
I could lie, I could kill, these were just two skills which I had learned as
It was quite easy then to reapply them as a new senatori*al* aide.
And that is how you find me now
Sowing seeds of disaccord,
Which you wouldn't have found if he'd been bound
Apprentice at a switchboard.